The Tommy Boy of goalies

Tommy: Hey, what’s your name?
Helen: Helen.
Tommy: That’s nice, you look like a Helen. Helen, we’re both in sales. Let me tell you why I suck as a sales man. Let’s say I go into a guy’s office, let’s say he’s even remotely interested in buying something. Well then I get all excited. I’m like Jojo the idiot circus boy with a pretty new pet. Now the pet is my possible sale. Hello there pretty little pet, I love you. And then I stroke it, and I pet it, and I massage it. Hehe I love it, I love my little naughty pet, you’re naughty! And then I take my naughty pet and I go
[makes ripping noises as he tears apart the roll]
Tommy: Uuuuuuh. I killed it. I killed my sale. And that’s when I blow it. That’s when people like us have gotta forge ahead, Helen. Am I right?

I chose this awesome quote from “Tommy Boy” to start off the description of tonights soccer game.  Team Mucho Gringo (guess who that is) against a local team.

Hold on, hold on.  You’re right.  There are a couple of thoughts I know you’re having:

1. Um, you’re in Mexico.  You’re not a soccer player.  Sure there was that one time when you were young and you had a momentary weakness in the summer when hockey season was done, but that doesn’t count.

2. You’re in Mexico.  These guys play soccer since they are born, they come out with cleats on.  You (being me) think soccer (or futbol) is a game best left for people who need to sleep.  Like golf and World Championship Bowling

3. Well at least you didn’t play goalie.

Um, ya.  About thought #3.  I kinda, actually did play goalie.  The whole game.  I’ve got the “pretty” knees to prove it.  Might have been a mistake.  But no one else was volunteering and I played goalie in hockey.  It’s pretty similar.

1. No equipment – Pardon me?

2. The net is 10 times as big – getting worse

3. You’re in Mexico – Why do you keep saying that?

OK.  So let me tell you about me as a goalie in soccer.  I’m not so good.  As Tommy Boy would say, “I suck.”  If they shoot the ball right at me, I can make the stop 50% of the time (not kidding here).  But, when they shoot the ball to the opposite corner and bounce it off the post (I suspect this was done intentionally, all three times) it’s a little harder.  I thought they got more than 10 but my team says it was less.  If it was, then HOORAY for us.

Also, Jon Nagel is awesome.  The guy’s Mexican name is “Oso”, which means “Bear” for those who did not know.  (Yes!  I know a Spanish word.)  Jon is a bear.  And he’s cute and cuddly too (I put that in to make him mad).  I think he said he’s never played soccer before, but as the only guy to score for our team he is no longer allowed to make this claim.  The guy knew what he was doing.  He got the ball in the offensive zone, stared down the goalie and then calmly put it in the opposite corner.  Then he yelled “That one is for my awesome goalie Ryan!” and pulled up his shirt Brandi Chastain style.  Ok, one or both of those didn’t happen.  But we needed to confirm that Jon rocks.

Enough soccer, but there should be plenty of good times for the season from this.  I don’t know if they’ll let me play goalie again though.

School is good.  If anyone ever wants their view of Christianity and missions turned upside down and inside out, the Missions Training School at GFM is the perfect place to be.  Or, if you don’t want to be challenged and just want to keep doing what you’re doing because it feels comfortable, then don’t come here.  You do not have a choice but to be changed at this place.  And it’s only been a week.  I now need to take some time to come to grips with the idea of doing EVERYTHING for God’s glory.  With the idea of sacrificing EVERYTHING for His name.  It may sound all cool and easy, but have you considered the definition of EVERYTHING?  Look it up, it’s pretty all inclusive.

Here’s my warning to friends and family back home.  When we come back next summer we hope you’re ready to talk about the church, the Christian life and the reasons and goals of missions.

Oh ya, here’s the link to Global Frontier Missions.  Their site is full of information on what they do.  I have yet to hear of anyone who didn’t come down for MTS or a short term trip that wasn’t radically and completely changed.  I dare you to check it out.


Oh ya, the geek squad rules.  Just thought I’d put that in there.  Those who need to know, understand.

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